Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Like Summer Camp Without the Chiggers

Wow! What a weekend!!!!

I just returned from the Anti-Obama March on Washington. They called it a "march" but we actually took a bus. From the looks of some of the other "marchers" it's probably a good thing too, because many of them didn't appear to be prepared to march any further than from the La-Z-Boy to the fridge and back (ha-ha).

We staunch true Americans came from all over this great country to wave placards, shout slogans and basically de-rail Obama's plan to convert our great country to socialism, communism, Marxism, fascism, Moslemism, Muslimism, tyrannyism, feminism, Bolshevism and all the other evil "isms". The good "isms", the ones that we support are: Americanism, capitalism, individualism and freedomism.

According to FOX News and Michele Malkin, our protest group was 2,000,000 strong. Of course, the D.C. police department claimed that there were about 70,000 demonstrators but then what would you expect from a department that has to kiss up to the new and illegitimate president and whose Chief of Police is probably some uppity with a hidden agenda. Oh, my bad, the D.C. police chief is a white woman by the name of Lanier. Makes you wonder if she can do the job AND take care of her family. She'd have to be a regular Sarah Palin and that's unlikely.

Anyhoo, in a country of 300 million people, the difference between 2 million and 70 thousand is a rounding error isn't it?

I was amazed at the diversity of our group (whatever its actual size). We were a veritable cross-section of true Americans. There were young white women, middle-aged white women, elderly white women, young white men, middle-aged white men, elderly white men, short white people, tall white people, thin white people and husky white people. There was even one women who looked sort of Oriental or Asian or whatever it is that slopes prefer to be called these days. I didn't actually see her in person but I saw a YouTube clip where she was praying in front of the camera. I couldn't tell from the video prayer exactly what she was praying for but it had to be something good because it was a prayer, right? She kept opening her eyes to see if the camera was still running and as long as it was, she would close her eyes again and continued praying. What a trooper!!!!

I'll bet that if Jesus were alive today and on earth, instead of being alive today but in heaven at the right hand of God, taking names, he would certainly have joined our crusade. Like us, Jesus was a rebel and he loved poking fun at people like that illegitimate president, Obama, who is just an uppity nig...a man with an evil agenda and certainly not one of us.

The creativity of our group was just too much fun. I was impressed by many of the signs and slogans. They just made me proud. Some of my favorites include:

The placard that read "The Zoo has an African (picture of a lion) and the White House has a Lyin' African" (ha-ha).

There was a great sign that read "Bury Obama with Kennedy" (ha-ha). What a clever way to say that a dead Obama would be good for the country without actually, you know, threatening the president which, apparently, is against some law. If you ask me, free speech regarding presidents has taken a real beating ever since the Kennedy shooting (John or Bobby, take your pick).

One large man had created a t-shirt with this message across the front: "We're mad but we came unarmed. This time." (ha-ha) It's subtle, I'll admit, and I had to think about what it meant for a few minutes. Here's my take; his message makes the point that unless things change (or not change) the way we true Americans want them to change (or not change), gun play is an option. That's how potentially dangerous we are.

One guy had created a large, long poster with pictures of Mussolini, Castro (Fidel not his weenie brother, Raul), Stalin, Obama (altered to look like Heath Ledger as the Joker in "Dark Knight" ha-ha), Marx (Karl not Groucho, silly), Chavez (Hugo not Cesar, the grape-picking communist, although that would have been good too) and Hitler. Some wiseacre reporter tried to point out that communism and fascism are very different "isms" and that Hitler and Stalin were mortal enemies because of their "ism" differences. But, that's not the point is it? If I have to explain to you what the point is, you are likely not one of us.

Another really clever placard read, "Politicians are Like Dipers. They need to be changed often and for the same reason." Poor guy had left out the "a" in "Diapers" and had to pencil a tiny one in between the "i" and the "p" but you couldn't really see the "a" from a few feet away. His idea was great though and besides, what's a little illiteracy among true American friends?

I'm pretty sure that our messages got through to the powers that be. According to Glenn Beck, Michael Savage, Rush, Sean Hannity and the rest of the brave and unbiased journalists, the administration and their lackeys in the Congress are now running scared. With the 2010 mid-term elections looming, they are afraid that they could be changed like dirty dipers (ha-ha).


Observoid of the Day: The Black Hole Theory of the Human Condition = some people are so dense that nothing illuminating ever escapes from them.


  1. I don't believe this march actually took place. I didn't see it on the news!

  2. Bruce - a very funny post! Hey wait a minute, you weren't being at all sarcastic in your observations, were you? Maybe you were, who knows. No matter anyway, what's a mere $1.6 trillion deficit amongst us Amercans anyway? (Notice I left the "i" out? - LOL)

  3. I must have missed that one, I only watch MSNBC.

    I was actually busy at a Pro-Debtor's rally in Sacramento. Really good stuff - 63 of Barry's unauthorized and unvetted Czar's were there, the finance minister of Zimbabwe spoke (he still thinks they are on the right track fwiw), several of Argentina's former Presidents were giving away Argentine peso's, and a couple of Pelosi's aides even showed up (they said she would have made it but Monday's are for botox, oh well). One creep from China showed up and tried to ruin the fun but we booed him off the stage, what an over-reactor!

    Krugman gave a rousing closing talk and urged us not to listen to anyone that tells you to save - the only way out of debt is to keep on spending. And if someone disagrees with you, or tries to use fancy statistics which disprove the recent stimulus effect, he said just to call them "deliberately obtuse" and "dunderheaded" (we all got a good chuckle out of that, I almost spit up my merlot and pate! He's such an intellectual riot!).

    Anyways, I thought it was great timing for the event and glad I went. The guy next to me with the "Leave Logic at the Door!" sign seemed to agree.

  4. Washington--

    You really should learn the difference between a parody of real events (mine) and fictional events (your response). It would make your contributions more impactful and clever. It's not that you are not smart and well read, however, your response has nothing to do with thinly disguised racism, oblique references to assasinations, armed revolt and casual illiteracy. These were the targets of my post, not the stimulus package or the national debt. When I do post a blog about the national debt, perhaps you will want to "copy" and "paste" your same comments. We wouldn't want your efforts to be a waste.

  5. Since the real (and parodied) parade was largely about over-spending I thought maybe a fictional parody of the exact opposite might be relevant and cute. Sorry for stepping on artistic toes, WH.

  6. Bruce-- How come you seem to have all the fun? Out here in the West Coast Universe, being the Blue State paradise that we are, not even our Town Hall Meetings were all that rambunctious. Then there was that matter of most of California bein' on fire. 'Course all the smoke blew east toward the Red States in the middle of the country. I've been waiting for Beck or Hannity, or somebody on Faux News to claim Obama planned it that way so he could prove global warmng or somethin' like that (notice how I left the "i" out of "warming"?) But gawdalmighty, who'd want to hold a demonstration in Topeka or St Louis this time of year? Bussing those 2 million folks out there (rounding up, of course) as patriotic as they are, into that heat, humidity, and evil pollution from California would have created the world's greatest epidemic of heat stroke. But worst of all would have been the electrical grid shutting down when all those anti-reform Republicans on Medicare plugged in their electric Scooters to recharge the batteries!

    Here's looking forward to your next Observoid,

    Your Horned Frog Bud,